Ethan was born on an unseasonably warm September morning, 5 days early, weighing 7 lbs 4 oz. I don't remember everything, but I remember the feeling of disbelief that in that instant, I had become a mom.
It's funny-- after 9 months of pregnancy, which was planned and had been discussed for what seemed like years, I still hadn't wrapped my head around the fact that I was now a parent. In fact, I still often refer to my son as just Ethan or "the baby," and even though intellectually I fully understand that he is my child, who I loved before he was even conceived, who grew and kicked in my belly for most of 2017, who rushed into the world in the blink of an eye, some days I can't believe I'm a mom.
So how is mommyhood, you ask? Well, in truth, being pregnant seems like 10 years ago, and even the first month of Ethan's life feels like a distant memory, so in one way, having Ethan is all I know. And, as I'm sure any new parent will say, we have had moments so distinctly beautiful and painful, sometimes both and once, and everything in between. Dave and I are both exhausted, but yes-- completely in love with our sweet little boy.
Breastfeeding was tough at the beginning, but not impossible. Sleeping through the night has been a pleasant surprise, but day naps have been a challenge. Ethan is wriggly and active, smiles tons, but can also be fussy for seemingly no reason at all. His weight is good, his skin is perfect and his eyes are the most beautiful shade of blue you have ever seen (no bias here folks!). But best of all, even though sometimes I don't believe it, he is mine.
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| Ethan, just a few hours old! |
